"We Built It"

Dear Lover,

 Politics aside ive been looking for you for a long time now, and even though finding things has never been a strong point for me, it seems that i cant give up on us.

 Another winter is coming, physicality aside i feel an emotional coldness brewing inside of me that has spurned from my recent non-achievements with love.

 Time is running out on us.

 I find that it takes me a long time to paddle to this magic island where men decide to make women their wives and do the grown up stuff of by starting a family but...

 Despite my hard work and intentional efforts i seem to have arrived at this island alone.

 Im confused and wondering where you are.

 There are mermaids belly dancing everywhere around this island but i chose to focus on the YOU + ME = Happy Ever After. 

 But what is happening before is not pleasant and i dont like it. Winter is coming...

 Ive written many things to you since our date

 Ive dreamed about what you and I would be like. I just dont quite understand how space and time have mistreated us so badly.

 Historically, I would create a musical sanctuary to re-access my failings but not even John Mayer is getting me through this right now.

 There is a deep sense of loss in me at the moment because i am not with you.

 This ties into the frustrations of knowing you cant be mine as well.

 So I tried to make you up. 

 I tried.

 I made a friend. And turned her into a best friend.

 Naivety and foolishly thinking we would work.

 And i started this slow real journey to this magical Island that men fear but face eventually and it turned into a world full of hurt.

 I dont think you can blame anyone really. If its not meant to be its not meant to be and im okay with that.

 But the "meant to be" needs to be ASAP. Winter is coming...

 Ive been looking for you dear lover.

 I chose to think of you as a princess whose words and demeanor demand the authority of a Queen.

 I guess i should start hanging around palaces.

 Maybe one day <------ I hate this. 

 Dont judge me by my demeanor or my current outfit.

 Ive got work tools in my hand ready to build our forever.

 I hope you are reading this where-ever you are.

 That would mean we are on the same page.

  -FBeezy

 Change


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